(Not gonna lie, I made these up. But I think they will be frequently asked questions. You know, someday. When I'm famous. So why not just answer them now?)
If this is a crafty blog, how come you keep posting crap about your life?
Good question! This actually isn't a crafty blog. I blog about my life. And my life includes crafts. It also includes friends, family, and stories about my frustrating, um adorable new husband. But I try to keep the Crafty Posts tabs up to date, and you are welcome to just go read those.
How do you pronounce Helena?
Hell-ay-nuh. There is actually an accent over the second "e" to make it say "A". No, I'm not making that up! It's on my birth certificate. My mom was really feeling her french heritage that year. Here, I'll put it in: Heléna. That's my real name.
Why did you choose Lanie Ree as your domain name? (back in the day)
That was my nickname when I was little. Helena Marie/Lanie Ree
What should I call you?
You can choose. In real life people usually call me Helena. But Lanie is great too. My future nieces and nephews will call me Aunt Layna (I've already decided). And my friend Adele calls me Ree. But I wouldn't want you to confuse me with the Pioneer Woman. Ok, who am I kidding? I would LOVE to be confused with the Pioneer Woman! I sort of want to be her when I grow up...
So why can't I find your blog when I google your real name?
First of all, I love that google is now a verb. And second of all, that is the reason right there- I didn't want creepy people (or ex-boyfriends) to be able to search my name, and then stalk me through my blog. I would rather have complete strangers reading about my Lingerie tips, and what I think about when I'm in bed.
What's the real reason?
Excuse me? That is a legitimate reason, and was a deciding factor. The other reason? I didn't want my mother in law to find my blog. The thought of her reading my lingerie tips and knowing what I think about when I'm in bed with her son creeped me out.
But she did find it. And she made it clear that she does not approve.
Are you pregnant?
This one should probably be the first question on this list because people ask this all the time. Mostly over the internet. If it was in person, I'd probably punch them in the face, and then go eat a brownie.
The answer is no. Not yet. We only got married July of '09, people. Calm down, we'll get round to it.
Are you really that terrible to your husband?
Yes. I really am. Ask him, he'll tell you.
Can I copy your words/pictures and use them on my blog?
Totally, as long as you credit me for my work. Proper credit includes a prominent, easily visible link to the source of the material you want to use. Don't try to pass my crap off as yours.
Also, please refrain from doing complete re-posts of my work without getting my permission first. You are welcome to use a few paragraphs or quotes and link people back to me, but if you want to use a whole blog post for something, ask me beforehand.
Is there a story behind that awesome stick figure dancing on your header?
Um, I think you mean that awesome PHOTOGRAPH of me dancing in my header. I took that picture myself.
Speaking of stick figures, can you teach me how to draw them like you do?
Yes. This is my stick figure tutorial. But that's just how I do it, and how you do it will probably be even more awesome. So play around, and develop your own style.
Where did you get that awful um, adorable shirt you're wearing in your profile picture?
It's a Woot! shirt. And watch it buddy, that's my favorite t-shirt you're talking about.
You are super awesome at promoting Giveaways. Will you host one for me??
Probably. Email me, and we will talk.
Can I interview you?
Yes. I will do interviews for free.
How do you feel about swear words?
I love them. I'm not kidding. Now, I'm not a fan of people cussing each other out. But when I'm around people (mostly girls) who casually swear, it just makes me happy. Weird, I know. I rarely use swear words myself. I'm bad at it, and it sounds forced. Maybe that's why I like it. Maybe I'm living vicariously through their potty mouths...Which sounds so much grosser than I intended.
You were homeschooled??
I know. And I'm not even a hermit.
You mentioned that you suffer from depression. I do too. Do you have any advice on how to handle it?
Well, I don't know anything about your situation, and I am not a therapist. However, I can promise that exercise will help, at least a little bit. As will talking to people. My mom suffered from clinical depression, which is a whole 'nother category. It wasn't until she received professional help that she started getting better.
Recently you started talking about your Mother. Can I ask how she died?
Yes, of course. She died in 2004, of colon cancer.
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