This afternoon, I called my sister in law. And yelled "Asshole!" into her answering machine. Then I hung up.
And now? We are enemies. Probably. Here, let me know what you think:
I was coming back from my doctor's appointment a few hours ago (which was actually scheduled for yesterday. Awesome.), and I decided to call Annie.
She didn't answer, so I thought I'd leave a little "Hey! I miss you! Let's talk soon!" message.
BUT THEN, I got cut off. Cut.Off. And we're not talking a little he-pulled-out-and-didn't-speed-up-enough cutting off. Oh no, this van sped up, merged 2 feet in front of me, AND HIT HIS BREAKS. Then, after almost causing an effing 4 car pile up, this genius made me back up SO HE COULD PARALLEL PARK.
Since my horn doesn't work right now, I yelled "ASSHOLE!" At the top of my lungs.
...right into my sister in-laws answering machine.
I gasped, and hung up in horror.
Looking back, there are so many ways I could have handled this.
I could have followed with "...not you. The guy who just tried to kill me."
Or I could have stayed on the line, and deleted the message.
But nope. I hung up. Guaranteeing that she will hear it.
She will also hear my next message; an apology between bursts of hysterical laughter. But she will get the "asshole" message first, and if she stops there... this could get awkward. Especially at the baby shower.
What would you do if you checked your messages, and heard that from me?