And then the Mysterious Pirate left this comment, which I added to the bottom of that post:
For no reason?! Seriously? Are you KIDDING me right now? Have you forgotten that a couple days before this little incident, you stole all of my clothes and my towel from the bathroom while I was showering and I was scared to shower for a week? Or how about the time that you pantsed me while I was dancing in the front of window of our apartment WITH BOYS AROUND? Or when my arch nemesis Gold's Gym called me obsessively because "I" had entered my name in their contest box thing 5 times in one week?! Where are the cutesy little paint drawings of THOSE things, I ASK YOU?!! Yeah you're right, my actions were completely unprovoked.
Apparently, I left a few details out.
And so here it is, the unabridged version of The Pirate's side of the story. This was originally published on her Xanga account, way back before we knew that her online journal was actually a blog.
An epic tale of shame and embarrassment
Monday, April 10, 2006
I wrote this in an email to my old roommate. Since I spent some time writing it, I thought that I'd post it.
"So me and my roommies have been having a prank war lately, and, considering your love of pranks, I thought that I'd tell you about what happened last night.
I was taking a shower, minding my own business, when my roommate came and stole my towel, my clothes, everybody else's towels, etc and put them all the way on the other end of the hall.
I screamed (like a man) and my other roommate heard me and was going to give my towel back, but then apparently she decided that it would be more fun to see how I would handle the situation. I'm glad that at least she had confidence that I would come up with an appropriate and modest response.
I was starting to get nervous, because, knowing my roommates, if I didn't take matters into my own hands, I could have been in that bathroom for hours, days, etc. And, even worse, I was a sitting duck for whatever other pranks they were undoubtedly planning.
Just as panic was starting to set in and I was considering begging for my book so that I could at least study while I waited, I saw it.
The shower curtain, in all its majestic, mildewy glory.
I swallowed my dignity, wrapped myself up in it, and strutted out with confidence. (Okay, I'll admit that while it was my intention to handle the situation with dignity, when I saw my roommates with the cameras, I probably reacted in a less-than-dignified way.)
That shower curtain was gross and so, naturally, once I had gotten the towel back, I had to shower again.
And then after they stole my towel again (I thought that I had a good hold on it, but apparently I didn't.
In retrospect, I probably shouldn't have yelled "You'll never get it again!" unless I felt some degree of confidence that they wouldn't be able to get it), I had to shower AGAIN.
It was crazy, but, don't worry, I got revenge. (That was after they laughed off my idea of having a roommate meeting to talk about the potential sanitary dangers of one roommate being afraid to shower.)
Okay, I'll admit that my revenge wasn't great. All I did was return the book that my roommate was reading to the Provo library, but, oh man, was that ever a minor inconvenience for her! She chased me the whole way and then she had to beg for her book back.
And I can't wait until our normal roommates find her underwear in a bag in the oven...
(I'll admit it: that last one is pretty immature. That's probably why I'm so proud of it.)"
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
Ummmm…sad news. Apparently some people don’t check the oven before they turn it on. So the underwear that I mentioned in my last entry: burnt to a crisp.
The roommate who did it said that she couldn’t even tell what it was when she took it out, because it was so burnt. Oops…my bad. At least it wasn’t ALL of her underwear!
(I added the pictures)
And that is her side of the story. Which may or may not be true.
You guys know me. What do you think?
My Favorite Comment:
"....And thank you for setting the record straight so I don't sound like a lunatic, running around randomly stealing people's underwear and storing it in my oven."