Tuesday, September 14, 2010

I am not pregnant. But thank you for asking.

Hi guys, I am participating in the SITS Get Back to Blogging event.

Today's prompt: Re-Upload A Post You Wish More People Had Read

That's easy. I wish everyone I know would read this post, because then maybe they would stop asking.

"Are you guys trying yet?" is fine. But "When are you due?" will never be a good way to endear yourself to me.

A few thoughts on not being pregnant...

You guys, it happened. And I am not happy. I was in church on Sunday, just minding my own business, when a man came up to me and stared at my stomach.

"When are you due?"


"I'm not pregnant." I said, horrified.

He laughed. "No, really. When are you due?"

I was speechless. "She isn't pregnant" said Kurt, coming up behind me.

There was a pause. A long, awkward pause as the man looked back and forth between me, Kurt, and my not-pregnant stomach.

"Oh. Wow." Then he walked away.

Kurt and I just stared at each other.

Next time that happens, I'm going to smile, pat my tummy, and say "April. Of 2012, butthead."

(Only I might not sensor it. It'll probably depend on how much chocolate I've had that day)

Then I'll punch him in the face. Or maybe I'll just go cry (Also depending on my chocolate intake).

Now I'm not sure what to say when I see this man. I'm thinking we will probably both pretend like it didn't happen. But it's sure gonna be awkward.

Have you guys ever had this happen to you?? Or maybe you've been the one to ask this question. Please let me know. I could use a few laughs, and I'd love to not be the only person in this situation!

Now please excuse me while I go eat my weight in vending machine candy bars.

(kidding, of course. I'm pretty sure I'm never going to eat again.)


I'm linking this post to my sister's meme, Small Treasures Tuesday. Because avoiding that man at church for the past few months has been a treasure.

This event is being sponsored by Standards of Excellence,Westar, and Florida Builder Appliances.



Jen V said...

Oh my gosh! How rude. I can't believe he didn't believe you when you said you weren't pregnant.

I have never had someone ask me if I was pregnant when I wasn't. However when I was pregnant with my first, one of the baggers at the grocery store yelled after me "Stop her, she's stealing a watermelon." I was about 6 months pregnant and huge. All the cashiers thought it was hysterical. Me not so much :(

Unknown said...

YES! It happened to me all the time! When i have 10 extra pounds it is on my Tummy and i get asked a lot. Like at church most of the time. People know also that we want a baby sooooo they expect me to be at any moment! This really makes me mad! Next time the Butt head is a good one!
I usually say...No i am not...I am just fat...And people apologize... I may go eat some candy now too...Crap.
So sorry it happened to you...So annoying!

the thrifty ba said...

i had that happen to me too! i told him no, i just eat way too many donuts and walked away.
of course i went and got a dozen donuts to eat after that...

Kendra and Caleb said...

What the heck? That man does NOT deserve a klondike bar. What an idiot. You should have said it's due the same time his is and then walked away. Or punched him.

Alexandria Rammell said...

I dont have any great stories but, my best friend. She was HOLDING her 3 months old and some one asked her when was she due! ummm hello, im holding a baby. I just had a baby. thought that one was obvious. and yet she apparently still looked very pregnant to be asked when she was due. she was NOT happy. Hard enough having your whole body change then after the baby is out you start to get your confidence back and some idiot ruins it!!!! Pretty awkward!

Liz Taylor said...

I was serving a mission in Hong Kong and a girl asked me that... I was so sad. I mean I'm not even a bigger girl, it's just alot of them over there are so bone thin. People need to just sit back and wait for an announcement. But church is the worse place for sure because it seems like every time you turn around 5 more women are pregnant.

Unknown said...

I liked/hated this post too! I also thought the one about the day you got married and went to your Dad's house (the basement bedroom) was hilarious. You are one of my favorite blog writers. Your "voice" is hilarious. Lucky husband!

Kitty Deschanel said...

What a jackass! (I should point out that I have not had my chocolate today)

viewfromdownhere said...

Oh wow, that happened to me too at a bridal shower for my cousin. Her mom's friend came up and asked "when is the baby due?" I was sooo upset after that. People...unless the woman is in stirrups and the baby is crowning, you do NOT ask if she's preggers.

Suzy Myers said...

I really don't know how I got off the hook, but I've never been asked that when I wasn't pregnant.

However, when I was pregnant, I worked at a restaurant and was often leered at by dirty old men who had to say, "I know what you've been doing!" Bleh.


S Farrell said...

Ahh yes. I used to love these comments most of which happened while I was carrying my one month old in my arms. Yeah idiot, I was carrying twins and the other one is still in there!

Chantel said...

I still can't believe that guy did that! So rude. Have you talked to him since then?

Thanks for linking up Helena! Oh, and I think you should slap him. :-)

Danielle said...

Um this is exactly why I love reading your blog, cause you talk (and edit your words) just like me. LOVE LOVE.

and no I have never been asked but I have heard others respond to the question about me so its not as bad but its annoying nonetheless!

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