Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Top Two (or three) Marriage Tips

I'm participating in Top Two Tuesday with The Undomestic Momma. This week's topic is Top Two Tips. How perfect.

Tip #1

So....Turns out fighting over Gchat isn't a good idea. Also, text fighting. Not as fun as it sounds.

The main problem with this kind of communication? You can't tell what tone the words were written in.

For example, when Kurt types "You had better not spend any more money this week", but forgets to add a smiley on the end, it comes across as both patronizing and controlling.

My response? "You aren't the boss of me!" (a classic)

It took us 12 hours to figure out that we were fighting about nothing.

That's my first tip- if are about to get offended, maybe you should make sure you've been insulted.

Tip #2

If you ignore my first tip ("what does she know? She's a newlywed"), at least listen to my second one. Once you are really mad, and filled with righteous indignation, You may decide to go shopping.

Don't take your wallet.

That $100 dollar pair of shoes you've been eying won't stand a chance. It's not entirely your fault- A 3 inch heel in that shade of revenge is so hot right now.

I say grab a $5 bill ($10 at the most), and leave your card at home.

This is especially good advice when it was a text fight, because once you guys figure out the whole thing was a misunderstanding, you're going to feel guilty about your shopping spree. And he might cut back on your allowance. It's not worth it.

Tip #3 (Yes, I have 3)

But if you decide to ignore my second tip, please pay attention to my third one.

If you just have to make an expensive purchase, don't buy the shoes. Head on over to Victoria's Secret instead, and buy some very expensive lingerie. It's just as satisfying, and that way when he finds the receipt, you have a chance at distracting him.

"But baby, I bought this for you!"

(And if you think revenge looks good on heels, wait until you see it in lace and leather).

Who says marriage isn't exciting?


I'm also linking this post to my sister's new meme, Small Treasures Tuesday. Because being married to me is a treasure.


dana said...

You are too funny! I enjoyed reading your tips. :o)

Chantel said...

Very good tips! I listened to all 3 :-)

Thanks for linking up! And I'm sure Kurt will agree that being married to you is a treasure :)

Lindsey said...

haha - i love your tips - all 3 are great! you are too funny!

Mix of 6 Blog said...

Stopping by from Top 2 Tuesday. Thanks for visiting my blog. I love your 3rd tip... to funny. Off to add you to my blogs to follow.

Syndal said...

Thanks for visiting my bloggy! Love your tips haha..very true!!

viewfromdownhere said...

I have text fought before, and it's totally not worth it. And I love tip #3. Too funny!

Lindsayb-mo said...

Newly Wed or not, I personally think those ar great tips!!! Thanks!

the thrifty ba said...

i notice kurt hasnt posted about what a treasure you are to live with...
(b/c im sure i am! in fact, my friends sometimes refer to dear hubby as 'the ever tolerant chris'.

Unknown said...

Oh my god, I loved this! :) You're so funny.

New Mommy!!! said...

Your tips are great!!

Ummm... I love the text one, that is too true!! But, I do love to text argue!!

Not taking your card would be no fun though. You can use the angry/hurt shopping as an excuse to shop, ha! That's the only time I ever get to shop!

The VS jab is good though...he he! I did that once or twice. VS is heaven to me anyway, mmmm, love it!!

Stephanie said...

Ha ha...love the tips! And must remember them, especially the only-bring-cash, and not the cc, tip! So true!

Megan@Just For Me...And You said...

So funny. Great tips. At my bridal shower, I was given the tip, "If you are going to fight, fight while taking your clothes off." Also great advice. :)

Brianna! said...

That is SO true about any for of TEXT conversation.
Whether it be email, or Instant messages, or text!!
and I can not stand that!
Everything is 99.9% taken the wrong way

The Undomestic Mom said...

great tips!!!!

AnPhibian said...

I've been married 18 years but I have to say, those are pretty good!

I would only add: don't insult your spouse's relatives. Even if your spouse is doing it. Because what you say will be remembered.

It's sort of like dissing your friend's ex when there's a chance they will get back together. Don't do it!

SkinnyMeg said...

haha too cute! After being together for 10 years even a sexy nighty won't distract him :) Use it while you can honey! Text fighting is pretty crappy....I'd rather yell and get my feeling across!

midwesterngal said...

This was hilarious and oh so true! Love your blog. :)

Corie said...

Loved the 3rd one :)

JoJo said...

OMG I laughed so hard at #1 because it's so true!!

Whenever JT tells me not to spend, I always get so defensive!

Oh and the V.S thing totally works! I was in Bloomies today. I don't know why I temp myself, but anyways instead of purchasing the sexy outfit I was dying to own, I went to V.S instead and purchased the miracle push up bra.

At first JT started getting angry when I told him the price.

Then I tried it on for him...;-).

Kenzie said...

My husband and I text fight all the time, that way I don't cry (I cry when I get mad) and can actually text yell at him! And by the end of the day our problems are solved and I haven't shed a tear!

michelle@somedaycrafts said...

YOu make me laugh!!!

Unknown said...

Your tips crack me up because they're SO TRUE!!!!!!! :) I don't shop when I'm angry, though. I eat fried foods. Equally as dangerous.

Tip 2 is my fav because you can get a lot with a $5, burn off some steam and maybe even walk away from your trip without spending it! :)

Unknown said...

So very true! My husband and I learned the no text fighting one the hard way. There wasn't any misunderstandings, but we both said some awfully mean things. It's so much easier to get carried away when you don't have to see the other person's reactions. Very awesome tips!

The Rantings of a Drama Queen's Mum said...

Good thing my hubby & I don't text.

Anonymous said...

Saying hi from SITS! Love the name of your blog. Maybe I should guest post - I grew up in PITTSfield MA :-)

I've been married a long time and can confirm that your tips are useful!

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